STAY CONNECTED
Yell! Magazine: Horror Movies, Hardcore Video Games, Heavy Metal, MMA, and more.
  • About Us Write for Yell! F.A.Q Contact Us RSS Feed XML Sitemap
  • Cult of Life
  • Movies
  • Video Games
  • Music
  • World of MMA
HomeMoviesReviewsThe Expendables 2 (2012) Review: The Old Men Comet ...

The Expendables 2 (2012) Review: The Old Men Cometh

NoFaceNorm by  NoFaceNorm  on @YellMagazine08/18/2012
Facebook
TwitterTweet


The Expendables 2 – Yell! Magazine review:

When The Expendables hit theaters in 2010, word on the street was that it was gonna be 16 different shades of awesome. Stallone writing and directing an ensemble action flick that showcases the best of the best? You’d have to be some kind of deficient to mess up a recipe like that.

And then it came and went, and was a little on the underwhelming side. Played too straight, too much Stallone and Statham, and muddled action scenes directed with the finesse of a gaggle of sock-puppets. It was hokey and hammy, and somehow it wasn’t over-the-top enough. The whole thing just wound up being a crying shame.

Rourke Sly Tattoo The Expendables

Afterward, The Expendables 2 was announced, and everybody’s thinking, “Oh, I see you’re milking the smooth udders of this cash cow so daddy Warbucks can buy himself a Stetson hat and a dump truck full of concubines. I thought this was a failed nostalgic one-shot, not a flaccid franchise showcasing old men shootin’ guns.”

At least, that’s what I said.

Pretentiously lowered expectations at the ready, I stepped into The Expendables 2 expecting more of the same. More of the same quick-cut, obscured hand-to-hand combat. More of the same lame one-liners and more of the same lack of camaraderie and buddy-buddy back-and-forth between the background members themselves.

And by Xenu, I was blown away. Blown to bits, really. Dragged under some tires and thrown into a ravine, only to be eaten by rabid badgers. I felt like I had been through some kind of religious experience.

It’s actually good. It’s actually everything it’s supposed to be. Action packed, intentionally funny, unintentionally funny, suspenseful, properly executed – it delivers on every level it promises to.

Schwarzenegger’s promoted to a role that extends beyond mere cameo. Bruce Willis receives the same treatment. Chuck Norris is a living, breathing in-universe Chuck Norris joke, and every member of the team gets the benefit of being fleshed out more.

The Expendables 2 - Chuck Norris
He even makes a Chuck Norris joke.

Granted, that isn’t to say that they’re given any sort of depth, I mean, we’re not watching Lorenzo’s Oil here. Still, every member is given a 50% trait boost, and they evolve from being sentient background noise to quipping stereotypes that manage to be funny on a lot of different levels.

The Expendables 2
Yell! Rating (x/5 Skulls):
[rating:4]
Year Released:
17 August 2012
Director:
Simon West
Cast/Crew
Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Randy Couture, Terry Crews, Liam Hemsworth, Jet Li, Dolph Lundgren, Yu Nan, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Chuck Norris, Bruce Willis, Arnold Schwarzenegger
Genre
Action, Adventure/dd>

Official URL:
TheExpendables2Film.com

We have more on The Expendables 2 after the jump…

Pages: 1 2
Related Items: ActionThe Expendables 2

More Articles Like This

uwe-thumb
EXCLUSIVE Interview With Uwe Boll On Rampage: Capital P ...
Battle Royale
Battle Royale (2000): Yell! Magazine's Greatest Film Se ...
ex-2-3-thumb
Top 10: Action Heroes Who Could Become Expendables! Or: ...
robocop_hugh-laurie-thumb
RoboCop 2013: Hugh Laurie Has Fled Murphy's Law
ex-2-thumb
New Trailer For The Expendables 2
Abraham-Lincoln-Vampire-Hunter-thumb
2012 Blockbuster Movie Preview - Summer Edition

Stay connected

Yell! Advertising

Hot Off The Press

  • Cute Baby Performs “5 Minutes Alone” On Jimmy Kimmel Live

  • New Music: Faith No More’s “Motherfucker” Is Finally Here!

  • Ho! Ho! HELL! – Silent Night, Deadly Night / Christmas Evil Double Feature Announced

  • Poland’s Deivos Says New Album Will Be “Fast, Heavy, And Technical!”

  • PIC: Anderson Silva Sparring With Jon Jones At UFC Headquarters

  • QOTD: Slayer’s Kerry King Confirms New Album Is “Pretty Much Done”

  • Amnesia Rockfest 2015: 10th Anniversary Dates Announced

  • Ice-T Ft. On Upon A Burning Body’s Cover Of “Turn Down For What”

Yell! Advertising

Where Subcultures Collide

Yell! Magazine is an ultimate source for horror movies, heavy metal, video games, MMA and more. This is where hardcore and fringe subcultures collide. Read More

Latest Tweets

  • Cute Baby Performs “5 Minutes Alone” On Jimmy Kimmel Live https://t.co/YKtboE1BMC
Follow @YellMagazine

Support

  • About Us
  • RSS Feed
  • Write for Yell!
  • XML Sitemap
  • F.A.Q
  • Privacy Policy
  • Contact Us
Copyright © 2010-2014, Yell! Magazine. All rights reserved.
Ad serving powered by EPOM.
Close
Stay Connected
We're a savage webzine with attitude.
We'll put your senses into overdrive.
Follow Me