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The Archive of The Matt

The Matt

The Matt Biography

When he was a kid, Matt fell in a vat of cream of wheat and gained awesome reviewing superpowers. He uses these powers to soundly trash the underworld of crappy movies and games. Warning: The Matt is highly radioactive and/or contagious, stay at a distance of 50 feet at all times. DO NOT FEED THE MATT! If fed, he may become attached to you and move into your place with no prior warning. If you find yourself in this situation, we recommend leaving a trail of pizza slices that lead out the door. Failure to do this may result in The Matt becoming a permanent fixture and more drastic measures may be required to get rid of him. Like calling his mother. Just kidding. He's just a geek that likes to play video games, praise good movies and talk trash about the bad ones. Matt Brissette, reviewer at large.

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